How To Let Go Of Past Pain And Move On With Your Life


Sometimes, no matter how much we try to avoid it, life hurts us. The very nature of being human is to feel, to experience life, and with that comes the ebb and flow of pleasure and pain.


The pain we experience in life can come in many forms and from many avenues. Often however, it isn’t the actual pain that ends up hurting us the most in life, but rather our insistence on holding onto that pain.


How often in life when we perceive that someone has hurt us do we ruminate over the things they did or said? How much do we like to blame and shame them, all the while wasting our precious energy on thinking about the past? It is almost as if we feel as though we are punishing that person by thinking nasty, negative thoughts about them or by choosing to hold onto what happened. But in truth we know that we are hurting ourselves in this process. The past is dead. Thinking about it will not change it.


So how can move on after life hurts us or gets us down?


1- Accept that you are hurt.

This may seem obvious but in fact most people avoid pain at all costs. If you can truly embrace your pain and accept that it exists, only then do you have the opportunity to let it go.


2- Release your feelings.

This part is another step of moving on from pain that we tend to avoid. As if accepting the pain isn’t enough, now I have to feel it?! YUCK.

Feeling where you are at and letting it out either to a counsellor or even a friend is a very healthy and necessary part of healing your wounds. If you aren’t much of a talker, you can release your feelings into exercise or even art. There is no right way, only your way. The important part is that you do it.


3- Live in the present moment.

Nothing from the past has the power to hurt you unless you choose to let it. If you have a hard time being present in your life, try starting a meditation practice or even do some yoga. Yoga brings the breath back to the body and the breath is the anchor to presence.


4 – Forgive, but keep the lesson.

Another reason we hold onto our past is that we convince ourselves that if we move on then we will forget about hat happened and make the same mistake again. Decide now to trust that you won’t. Make a note somewhere safe like a journal, and record the lesson or lessons that have come from your painful experience. Then close the book and move on with your life.


Life is too short to hold on to past hurt. None of us know when our time is up and there is so much beauty in the world that will be missed if you keep living in the past.