How to Stop Complaining And Become A Happy Person
If you complain quite often, it’s not entirely your fault. Science has revealed that evolution favors complaining. We need to focus on problems to fix them and improve our lives. Moreover, nothing unites people better than a common dislike. So, don’t blame yourself if you complain too much.
Once you realize that complaining is sucking your energy, see it as an opportunity. Why? Because not many people make the effort to fix their complacency. Once you stop complaining, you’ll discover newfound energy and happiness in your life.
Complaining drains our energy by producing stress hormones every time you complain.
The more you complain, the more you’ll have to complain about. This creates a vicious circle of negativity, increasing your stress and anxiety levels.
Wired For Change
The first step to stop complaining is to understand neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the ability of our brain to form new neural connections, especially in response to new learning or experiences. So how does this help stop complaining?
The key here is that complaining is just a thinking habit that can be changed.
How to Stop Complaining
Now that you know you can change, here are six practical ways to stop complaining and become a happy person.
1. Go on a ‘No-Complaint Diet’
When you catch yourself complaining, pause and say something positive about the situation. This no-complaint diet can last from hours to days, but start small. Start with a 3-hour period to be mindful and focus on the positives.
For example, if you catch yourself saying that, “I feel so tired and overworked. I hate my life”, pause for a moment, breathe, and say, “But it will make me a workhorse and increase my odds of success. And I still get two hours to relax every night!”
How to Stop Complaining: Go on a no-complaint diet.
2. Stay Away From Complainers
Famous motivational speaker Jim Rohn used to say that you are the average of five people you spend the most of your time with. So if you are surrounded by people who complain about everything and praise nothing, you need to keep away from them.
Remember, criticism causes anxiety, stress, and blocks awareness. On the other hand, praise increases awareness and energy.
How to Stop Complaining: Stay away from people who complain all the time.
3. From Complaints to Solutions
When you become aware of your complaining behaviors, take note of the few things that bother you the most. It might be your noisy neighbor, aggressive boss, or unsupportive spouse. Once you figure out the problem, take consistent action until it is fixed.
Sometimes we forget that problems cannot be solved without conscious effort. As Tony Robbins says, “The only problem we really have is we think we’re not supposed to have problems! Problems call us to higher level – face and solve them now!”
How to Stop Complaining: If a problem is bugging you for a long time, resolve it.
4. Break it with “But”
Whenever you catch yourself complaining, add “but” at the end of the sentence and say something positive.
For example, “I am so lazy, I will never be successful”…“but laziness is just a habit and I can change it. I will exercise ten minutes every day to have more energy.”
How to Stop Complaining: End complaints with but and say something positive.
5. Count Three Blessings Every Day
Sometimes the best way to eliminate negatives is to add more positives. Choose a time and count your three blessings at that time every day – before bed or after waking up is generally preferred by most people.
In fact, soldiers are often taught this exercise for mental strength when all they can see around is bodies drenched in blood. The great thing about gratitude is that you cannot feel thankful and angry at the same time. So it dissolves all negativity.
How to Stop Complaining: Be grateful, count three blessings every day.
Meditate for a few minutes every day to center your mind. Once you are grounded in the present, you will stop being reactive towards tough situations.
Things are not bad, your mind and perception make them bad. So take control of your mind with meditation. This makes you more aware of situations, and as a result, you are always calm and composed even in tough situations.
Now that you know how to stop complaining, move forward in life with a positive attitude. Try some of the techniques to form a new habit of feeling fulfilled and positive.
How to Stop Complaining: Meditate to stop being reactive.